I need to stop underestimating Sonny. Every time I think he couldn’t possibly be any more of a dick, he tops himself.
You almost have to admire that kind dedication, you know? Not everyone could pull it off with that much consistency. Some guys might take a look around at all the destruction they’d already left in their wake for one day and given up for the night.
But not Sonny! He always goes for the maximum!
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I can’t decide on his worst moment of the episode:
- Sneering and screaming at everyone else’s efforts to find Carly without lifting a single finger himself to help?
- Showing up at his children’s home in the middle of the night to drag them out of bed and have a hissy-fit/pissing contest with their step-father?
- Accusing Jax of thinking he “owns” Carly and the boys (which is obviously an outrage because they’re Sonny’s property, damnit!)?
- Whining to Olivia about how guilty he feels so she’ll absolve him of any wrong-doing? (Sonny is like one of those people who constantly complains about how fat they look, just so you’ll be forced to say they’re not.)
- Admitting that his “plan” was to goad Claudia into pulling a gun on him, forcing someone else to kill her? (Way to take responsibility, Sonny! And make really reckless choices with the lives of all your oldest and dearest friends!)
And on top of all that, he busted out a soliloquy on his undying love for Carly, which we’re now expected to believe is greater than his love for any other woman he’s ever known, including Brenda. Which–just… NO. Sorry. Don’t buy it. Never will. Fuck you, Guza.
Of course, all of that almost paled in comparison to crap like this:
OLIVIA: My heart is breaking for him. He’s just trying to be a good father, you know?
NO, I DO NOT KNOW, OLIVIA. BECAUSE YOU JUST MADE MY BRAIN EXPLODE.
(I know other things happened in this episode, like Carly finally, finally giving birth after roughly 45 months of HIGH! RISK! PREGNANCY!, or Jason’s existential angst over realizing yet again that he is a horrible person, or Dante and Lulu’s completely implausible yet strangely endearing water adventures. I’ll get to those later, I promise. You know… once the rage cools.)