This show turns so fast, it gives me whiplash.

I was feeling pretty meh about the “big reveal” on Friday, and the follow-up on Monday didn’t do much for me. But today, I did a one-eighty. Friends, I actually watched this episode more than once! MORE THAN ONCE! WHAT IS HAPPENING?!?

There were so many great pieces of dialog that my fingers wouldn’t be able to handle typing them all. Here are some of the pearls we got to see today:

Lulu: Okay fine, then I’m going to the hospital because maybe I’m wrong. Maybe there was an accident and Dominic is there. But if he is not there, the next place that I am going is to the police and telling them everything that I know about you and Sonny and your business. If Dominic is dead, I hope that you and Sonny burn in hell.

Wow, that made my little heart sing. It’s nice to see Lulu use her judgmental ire for good.

And there’s more!

Kristina: This is exactly why I hate our father. He poisons everything around him. Not even a christening can be beautiful. It all gets ruined by Dad. I’m just telling the truth! Dad shot a cop. That is the worst crime you can commit. That’s why it’s called “murder with special circumstances.” I hope Dad goes to prison for the rest of his life!

Sounds like someone’s been watching Law and Order. I guess I can buy that Alexis’ daughter might have some knowledge of legalese. But it really comes down to the fact that I’m willing to over look the awkwardness of that line because the rest of that piece of dialog was pure magic. And man, did Lexi Ainsworth act her little heart out. Bravo!

Speaking of the acting chops of the SORASed kids:

Morgan: Dominic is not a liar! He’s a hero!  No, Dad’s a criminal. Dominic was probably trying to arrest him. That’s what the cops do. They’re the good guys.

He really pulled out my heart in those scenes. What a great little actor.

Then, in the same episode I was somehow given this scene as well:

Olivia: If you are here to unload on me, I understand John. But I got to respectfully ask you to do it another time. I’ve gotta be with my son right now, okay?
Johnny: He’s Sonny’s son too, right? Well, at least now I understand all the lies you told and why you told them. I’m not here to unload on you, Olivia. I’m here to be by your side if you want me.

There are no words for how sexy Johnny was in that moment. A man who puts your needs over his own? HOT!

Finally, as if this episode was written for me, we were given the ultimate smack down of Sonny, via Lulu’s rage. Viewing it is the only way to really do it justice, so let’s watch it again, shall we? It starts at 4:00 minutes:

(The rest of the video also includes many of the amazing performances already outlined above.)

Even the off moments were entertaining in a “WTF was that?” kind of way.

The first example of this was the horny guitar strum playing while Lisa ogled Patrick. I mean, honestly, I don’t blame the lady. I don’t think I could keep my eyes on anything else if Patrick was undressing around me, but the cheesy soundtrack that always plays on GH to indicate “sexy time” was especially hilarious at this moment. I just can’t take her seriously as a threat to Patrick and Robin when they set it up like that. I was over this plot a month ago. Let’s move on, already.

And then Carly tried to reassure Morgan about Dominic’s health with some sage advice:

Carly: You know what, Morgan, maybe Dominic’s okay. Maybe his injuries aren’t so bad. I know Lulu was upset and that’s understandable, but not all gun shot wounds are life threatening.

Yeah, Morgan. You probably didn’t know this, but your Dad shot your Mom in the head when she was giving birth to you, and now she’s totally fine! See, everything will turn out peachy!

But the most unintentionally entertaining aspect of this episode had to be the countdown to Sonny reverting back to his old ways. That’s always a fun game to play! (And not as dangerous as the GH Whore/Slut Drinking Game.)

This time Sonny’s rehabilitation lasted all of two minutes!

Sonny: I want the best for Dante.
Steve: Dr. Drake has limited experience with this kind of surgery. I have performed it countless times. For this particular case I am the best.
Sonny: Well, you better be, because if my son dies, I’ve got nothing to lose by making you pay.

Really, Sonny? I’d like to say that this was the worst example of douchebaggery Sonny displayed this episode, but sadly, it was not.

Sonny: … If you had just told the truth we wouldn’t be in this tragedy. [Ed. note: How about if you didn’t shoot people as part of your lifestyle you wouldn’t be in this tragedy!?!]
Olivia: All right, fine, Sonny. It’s all on me. Okay, it’s my fault. Just unload on me another time, because right now I’m gonna get my son through this. So you just need to get out of my face, just go away.
Sonny: Where do you get off telling me to get out of your face when you’ve been lying to me about my son?

Sure, Sonny, I can see the comparison. Lying about paternity is totally worse than shooting another human being point blank in the chest. I don’t know how Olivia couldn’t see that.

How about you go jump off a cliff and die already?

Strangely enough, this disgusting behavior just made it all the more delightful to see Sonny carted away in handcuffs at the end of the hour.

I don’t think I could have envisioned a more satisfying episode.

Unfortunately, I’m too smart to believe it will last. So for now, I will revel in the truth-telling in all its glory.

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14 thoughts on “This show turns so fast, it gives me whiplash.

  1. OMG. Well, you know what kind of day I’ve had. And now I’m sitting here with a glass of wine and watching this and it is entertaining me on MULTIPLE LEVELS. You didn’t even quote the Johnny speech to Maxie about “poor Sonny” — I DIED, I LOVED IT SO HARD.

    This episode was so good, I couldn’t even manage more than an eyeroll at the inevitable stupid parts, like Mac and co. just announcing all the details of the undercover operation right in front of Maxie, or Patrick having to be not only the best neurosurgeon in the history of EVER, but the best every kind of surgeon (seriously, though, I am so over the whole “Patrick is the BEST!” plot).

    Still! Lulu! Kristina! Morgan! Johnny! SO MUCH LOVE!

    • I KNOW! I loved that Johnny speech too, but I just ran out of steam. There was so much to transcribe.

      And yes, those parts were also annoying to me, but I could barely care.

      This episode was seriously made of awesome.

      • Johnny’s too good to Olivia, imo. She runs back and forth between him and Sonny and he doesn’t deserve that. What’s with Olivia letting Sonny be alone with Dante, anyway? If that were my son I would kick Sonny’s ass and give him a taste of his own violent medicine if he ever came near my son again.

        Loved Lulu for loudly proclaiming the truth about Sonny and Jason.

        Lisa is a waste of space, but Patrick Drake is a fine specimen indeed. Next time I’d like to see him get naked with his wife in a supply closet or something and thus show Lisa that she really needs to get a life. Preferably outside of Port Charles.

        • I can understand why people would be upset with Olivia. But I never feel like she is really torn between Sonny and Johnny. The writers make the words come out of her mouth, and I’m sure they are going to smush her with him at some point, but I really buy into her feelings for Johnny. And I just think the actors have great chemistry so I hope they don’t rip them apart too soon.

  2. Oh I think my ridiculous limit was hit when Sonny was all “TELL MY SON I LOVE HIM AND TO FORGET THAT WHOLE HE’S SCUM FOR BEING A COP THING!” while he was getting hauled off. I once accussed Nik of being an ILY slut but Sonny takes the cake there.

    He tried to step to Steven? You don’t step Steven. He is awesome and makes fabulous smirky faces! I credit Cam’s glare ability to him now. I did love how Steven was completely unimpressed by Sonny. LOVE!

    Honestly while I did enjoy the berating of Sonny….I was getting flashbacks to when we got this after Michael got shot in the head….and not a danged thing changed.

    • No doubt. I have no confidence in the slightest that this will last. In fact, I predict that today’s episode, meaning Wednesday, will include all manner of Sonny propping. But until then, I will bask in the glow of having my point of view validated for once.

  3. Okay, what was the purpose of having Matt appear in this episode (in case you missed it, Maxi asked him about Dante’s condition). Either give him a story or let him go, people!

    • Yeah, Tenillypo pointed out to me Matt’s presence in this episode. Sad thing is, I didn’t even mention him in the post because it was so brief and I honestly forgot.
      It is continuously infuriating to me how they consistently waste that character and Jason Cook.

  4. Lulu going off on Jason and Sonny? So what…who cares. Lulu lived with Jason and Spin in 2007 for a couple of months, she was all over Milo/Spin/Dillon at the beginning of that same year, she bashed Logan in the head, she was with Johnny for almost 18 months (he’s a mobster too) and she’s been all up in SaSon business since she showed up in 2005, if you want to run with the big dogs, then expect to get bit on the butt.

    One more thing, Lulu wanted to be so bad, she kept Liz’s paternity secret and went to Jason FIRST, instead of going to Lucky, she has no loyalty, as for Dominic/Dante, he got blindsided by Douche-bag Sonny, but that is ON Sonny.

    • Well, for me, it really wasn’t about who was saying it. It was about the fact that it was said at all. There are about 10 Sonny praising remarks to every disparaging one. It was nice to see that reversed in this episode.

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