1. You see, Aiden? You see what happens when you stop being an asshole to Nolan? He gives you presents and a nickname, and then the three of you get to play fun spy games together! I approve of all these things.
(But let’s be honest: Emily is not Moneypenny. She is effing Bond and M combined, and Aiden is just the sexy Bond Girl who’s just going to end up dead by the end of the movie, so let’s not get too attached, kids.)
2. Ashley’s back! And she’s Conrad’s… campaign manager? I don’t even know. Her job description gets more vague and unnecessary as time goes on. She started out as a party planner, right? Then she was a personal assistant/mistress. And now she’s just kind of there for all purpose evil management. Hey, work with what you know, right?
3. VINDICATED! I knew she was too nice for this show! So, Padma’s evil and Marco — in a shocking twist if you’ve never watched television before — is the one who was actually telling the truth. Oh, and also, Nolan created some super dangerous, super secret program back in the day that the Initiative now wants to get their hands on. FOR EVIL.
I kind of love Madam Initiative? First of all, she’s talks down to Daniel, which immediately won her my heart. She was kind of a badass during Aiden’s fake kidnapping. And she spends her downtime sitting in the dark in her CONFERENCE ROOM OF EVIL spying on people on her GIANT EVIL TELEVISION SCREEN. She is living the life. I really need to see her, Emily, and Victoria try to all out-death glare each other.
4. Speaking of which, Victoria and Emily pretending not to hate each other is so beautiful to me. Look at this face! That is the face of a woman attempting to murder another person WITH HER EYEBALLS:
Madeleine Stowe is a national treasure, y’all.
5. I love the way Fauxmanda’s mind works. Jack — because he continues to be the living embodiment of Nice = Dumb — forbids her from going to Emily or Nolan for help (WHY, JACK, WHY). And of course, because Fauxmanda is always only half a breath away from murdering someone, she immediately decides that would be the best solution. You know, instead of just ignoring him and going Ems and Nolan anyway. I mean, Jack didn’t specifically tell her not to kill everyone, right? So it’s not like he could get mad about it after. Duh. OH, FAUXMANDA. NEVER CHANGE, YOU CRAZY, HOMICIDAL BUTTERFLY.
(Although I did also love her having to explain to sweet, stupid, epically self-involved Charlotte that Declan’s family crisis was just not about her. Charlotte and Carly really ought to get together and compare notes on how wronged they’ve been by other people’s tragedies.)