Gimme Some VD: “American Gothic”

Despite the fact that this episode was about ten times better than most of the episodes this season, indifference, the flu and a short show hiatus delayed this post even more so than usual. My bad! But if the show can’t seem to tug at my heart strings lately, at least I can find comfort in the fact that Ian Somerhalder and Nina Dobrev are some of the cutest and sweetest famous people out there. For Reals.

Previously on Vampire Diaries: Damon tried to fool Elena and got played by Elena and Rebekah instead. Booya!

We open on Elena and Rebekah pulling up in a random town. Rebekah yells at Elena for getting out of the car, but Elena whines that she is tired of driving around to all the places on Katherine’s list of previous hideouts and wants to take a break. Oh, and she really doesn’t like Rebekah very much. Heh.

Doppleganger hijinks

Elena decides to take a meal pit stop and coincidentally finds out that her snack knows Katherine. Wow, that’s convenient. And the lady has been compelled to not answer any questions about Katherine unless Katherine is the one asking. Double convenient.

Stefan to the rescue! He appears to be meeting Damon at his abandoned car that the girls ditched when it ran out of gas. Wow, that’s just lazy, ladies. Stefan jabs Damon about losing both the girls and the list. Luckily, Liz gave him the info on the new car they stole and where to find it. Damon makes some comment about how emotionless!Elena is a bitch and he won’t trust her until she’s the old Elena again. Ugh. Eff off, Damon. New Elena Rulez! Also, she is basically just acting exactly like you do all the effing time. So suck it.

Klaus is fooled

Meanwhile, at casa de Klaus, that other jerkface is writhing in pain as he tries to dig the white oak stake out of his back. There is a lot of screaming and bone breaking. Gross. Caroline shows up wondering what all the fuss is about. She seems like she’s going to comfort him… until she reveals that she’s actually Silas. Anyone want to place bets on whether Silas will actually get his own face ever?

Elena and Rebekah continue their super sleuthing to find Katherine. Some compelled dude tells them he just saw Katherine two minutes before. The ladies split up just in time for Katherine to jump Elena. Okay, everyone keeps commenting on Elena’s hair and yes, it is cute, but it is pretty similar to Katherine’s hair. Maybe the pink color is more noticeable in person? Is my TV color off?

Katherine, Elena and Rebekah sit down for a lovely chat at a local diner. Katherine surmises from Elena’s lack of Ophelia-style grief that she has turned her emotions off. She tries to be cute and ditch the girls, but Rebekah is not having it and stabs Katherine in the hand with a fork. Yowch.

Katherine speared

There’s more cure talk. The ladies want it; Katherine doesn’t want to give it to them. Yadayadayada. Katherine wants to give the cure to Klaus in exchange for not having to run from him anymore. Since Katherine is not cooperating, Elena uses her Scooby Doo gang skills to find an appointment on her phone. Jeez, Kat, it’s called a password. Duh. Anyway, Katherine is supposed to meet a mysterious “M” at 2 pm and Elena plans to go instead.

Caroline shows up at Klaus’ place for reals this time and yells about him harassing her with phone messages. Klaus, assuming she is Silas again, tells her to leave him alone. Caroline spews off something about a prom committee or twelve that he is keeping her away from and Klaus instantly realizes that Silas is way more into organizing massacres than school dances. He explains about the stake stuck in his back and his need for her help. Caroline (and I) find this hilarious.

Caroline find Klaus hilarious

Klaus is not amused

Of course, instead of appealing to Caroline’s humanity, he reminds her in the most threatening way possible that she and her friends all will die if he dies. Caroline begrudgingly agrees to help.

Stefan and Damon are now in Katherine’s not-so-secret hideaway town. Stefan asks Damon what they are going to do when they find Elena and Rebekah since Elena wants nothing to do with them and Rebekah can kick their asses. Damon says (straight out for once) that he doesn’t care what Elena wants because she is close to “going off the rails for good,” whatever the eff that means. At this point she doesn’t give a crap about her friends or anything else, except continuing to stay in her current state. I’d say this train is officially derailed.

Stefan reminds Damon that he was the one who wanted Elena to embrace being a vampire, but apparently that’s only when she’s sired to him and does exactly what he wants. You guys, you are both THE WORST.

Katherine burns Rebekah

Elena takes Katherine’s jewelry and jacket to play the part. Katherine tells them that Elena won’t be able to pull it off, but Elena is convinced otherwise. While Elena leaves to wait for her appointment, Rebekah enjoys taunting Katherine about how miserable her life is now. Oh, Rebekah. As much as I actually can tolerate you now and even like you sometimes, you are no Katherine. Katherine makes everything better. And she proves that by throwing out some vicious snark that makes Rebekah want to break her wrist. Fortunately, Stefan and Damon interrupt before she is able to do so.

Back at the gazebo, Katherine’s mysterious meet up shows and it is none other than EEEELLLLIAAAJJJAH. Ahem. Elena is clearly surprised and tries to cover. Badly. He brushes her hair away from her face and pulls her in for an extremely hot kiss. Wait, what was that? Was that some actual hot chemistry on  our screen? I had forgotten what it looked like! Man, Elijah and Katherine really do make everything better!

Elijah and Elena kissjpg

They finish their make out session and Elijah tells her that he’s missed her. He asks her if she has “it” with her. Elena is confused by this, which, uh, why? The cure is what everyone is looking for right now. Duh. Elijah also thinks this was an obvious mistake and calls Elena out right then and there.

Back at the diner, the four amigos continue to snark at one another. Katherine reveals that Elena is with Elijah. This does not sparkle with the boys. Rebekah gives up Elena and Elijah’s location to keep anything from happening to Elena, and Katherine gives in and agrees to take them to the cure instead.

Back in Mystic, Caroline is busy slicing into Klaus, trying to find the piece of the white oak stake. She can’t seem to find anything in there. Klaus complains again… some more. And Caroline decides that she doesn’t really want to help him unless he agrees to let Tyler come safely back to town.

Klaus and Caroline surgery

Elijah and Stefan exchange threats over the phone. It really is kind of hilarious considering they are the least menacing off all the characters. After they hang up, Elena and Elijah have a heart to heart about his love for Katherine. Elena points out that he is being a fool just like Damon and Stefan. Elijah thinks that Katherine has told him everything, but turns out she left out the part about killing Jeremy. Oops.

Katherine takes Rebekah and Damon the house where she’s been staying, but claims the cure has been stolen. They proceed to search the house because of course she’s lying. Duh. Damon finds a container in a fish tank full of vervain water. Katherine grabs it from him, but not before dunking his head in the tank and frying his face. Hilarious!

Damon sucks

But just then Rebekah shows up, so Katherine throws the cure and makes a run for it. Damon tries to convince Rebekah not to take the cure, but backs off when Rebekah points out that Damon doesn’t really want Elena to have it. She takes it just in time for Stefan to show up and have a meltdown.

Back at Klaus’ house of pain (and not the fun kind), Klaus continues to scream about the pain of the stake in him. Caroline continues to refuse to help him until he agrees to let Tyler come back. Klaus points out that his word really isn’t worth much. Uh, Klaus. That is most certainly true, but I don’t think this helps your case right now.  Caroline points out that if he wants to be friends he needs to show her she can trust him. Caroline, don’t waste your time trying to explain friendship to this d-bag. Pu-leaze.

Klaus in agony

They start screaming at one another and suddenly Klaus notices his pain has stopped. Apparently it was all put in his head by Silas. Uh-oh. That isn’t good. Klaus appears to show some sign of gratefulness because Caroline snapped him out of it. That was strange.

Stefan and Damon fight about the fact that Rebekah got the cure. Oh good god, I can’t express how tired I am of all of their bickering.

Elena and Elijah chat about men trying to save their ladies. It really does make the whole thing sound so sad and infuriating. They all have an effing Madonna complex. It is sickening. Elena reflects again on how she is happy to not have emotions anymore and to leave her life behind. Of course, Elijah also mansplains that Elena should want her old self back. He just does it in a much more sexy and tolerable way, mostly because he doesn’t appear to have any romantic designs on Elena (at least not for now, but one can only hope!) so it seems like it has a less selfish motive (although it still is selfish because if he believes that the old Elena can return, then so can the old Katherine).

Elijah is charming

But still, I love Elijah so much that I can feel more sorry for him than anything. Also, side note: how is it possible that Elijah and Katherine got together and we didn’t get to see that hotness on screen? DAMN THESE WRITERS! Anyway, Katherine shows up and knocks Elena out.

Back at Katherine’s random house, Rebekah has woken up and says she feels good. Damon tries to throw an arrow at her face, but Rebekah catches it with super vampire speed and heals quickly. Katherine totally faked them out! Dun!

Elijah points out to Katherine that she is being a total jerk. Katherine thinks she’s just doing what she needs to do to survive. But she claims she isn’t using Elijah and that she truly loves him. He is clearly not convinced. Katherine gets desperate and reveals her need for Elijah to talk to Klaus. This seems to be the last straw for Elijah. He says goodbye.

Katherine and Elijah

Katherine then goes to the girl who Rebekah and Elena spoke to at the beginning of the episode and retrieves the real cure. Katherine tells the girl that the package is her freedom. Oh Katherine. I love you. I love that you don’t make excuses for who you are. You don’t pretend to be the good guy. Never change! Except in the next beat she finds Elijah and tells him that she doesn’t remember who she was, but she wants to. She gives him the cure  to prove that she loves him. Awwww. I heart them.

Rebekah finds Elijah and tells him she wants the cure. He points out that it might not be the answer she is looking for, and seems hurt that his sister doesn’t want to be with them any longer. Poor woobie. Klaus calls Rebekah to check in and she hands the phone to Elijah. It is almost sweet how excited Klaus is to hear his voice… almost. Elijah tells him that he’s bringing the cure back to Mystic Falls. Klaus is eager to work things out “like family.”

After they hang up, he thanks Caroline for her help. Man, I hate Klaus, but his chemistry with Caroline is undeniable. Damn it!

Klaus and Caroline chemistry

Klaus and Caroline chemistry2

She asks if Tyler can come back and he is clearly not willing to allow that, but points out that he isn’t actively looking for him. Big of you, Klaus!

Back with the brothers of angst and whining: Damon admits that he messed up by allowing Rebekah to take the cure. They point out how they keep doing the same things, just like Katherine. Stefan says that once they get Elena the cure, then he is going to get his own life. Oh, for the love of god, yes, please. Do that! I would be so freaking happy if he did that.

It turns out Elena has texted the boys and asked them to join her at the diner. They walk in determined to convince her to let them help her. But she tells them that she doesn’t want the cure and never will. She asks them if they will accept that and promises  there will be consequences if they don’t. Stefan points out that she never gave up on him and he can’t either. So, Elena calmly puts down her coffee cup and snaps the neck of the waitress.

Stefan  and Damon in shock

Holy effing cow! THAT. WAS. AWESOME. Elena thinks that life was on them, and if they keep pushing there will be a whole lot more. I LOVE YOU EMOTIONLESS ELENA! NEVER LEAVE ME! Characters who unapologetically act in their own self interest are totally okay by me (and usually way more fun) as long as they don’t pretend that they are doing otherwise. Take note, Damon and Stefan!

Next time: Elena goes to prom. Really? They can really get her to go to prom now??


2 thoughts on “Gimme Some VD: “American Gothic”

  1. I share pretty much all these feels, particularly the unexpected hotness of Elena and Elijah. (And the total cheat of not showing us all the hot Katherine/Elijah reunion sex they must have been having!)

  2. Elena and Elijah have been my dream couple forever. But you know what else I want to see? I want FLASHBACKS of Elijah with Tatia? (Tatiana?) Whomever the Dopplegangers are Dopplegangering because WHY NOT? Who started this merry go round?!

    Elijah, sweet, sweet Elijah.. why are you leaving me for another show? *whine*

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