The name’s Ms. Davis if you’re nasty.

There comes a time, gentle readers, when a character will say everything that you’ve been screaming for years, with only your cats to hear. And it will be magical.

For me, that time was yesterday:

Alexis smack down

SHAWN: Alexis look, don’t you see? This changes everything!
ALEXIS: Except it doesn’t! Don’t get me wrong. For the sake of your conscience, I’ve relieved that you’re not responsible. But whether or not you actually shot Olivia doesn’t change the fact that you tried to kill someone. And it wasn’t out of passion, it wasn’t because you were in fear for your life, it wasn’t even a personal vendetta. It was because it was a job. A job! You were doing it because someone else asked you to. And if you think you can dress that up anyway you want, you can’t.

::slow clap::

I mean, right? This “I’m innocent because I only intended to kill someone” crap is the same line of bull this show has been feeding us for a decade and finally, FINALLY somebody laid a little logic down in response. And that’s not all Ms. Davis and her fabulous rack had to say:

SHAWN: So it’s that cut and dry with you? You’d end our relationship over my job?
ALEXIS: Don’t say it like you run the local diner–
SHAWN: [condescendingly] I do, Alexis.
ALEXIS: Among other things! Things like KILLING PEOPLE FOR MONEY!

THAT WAS SO GOOD FOR ME, Y’ALL.

(I didn’t think people were actually allowed to say that in Port Charles! Aren’t they required by law to use a cutesy euphemism like “enforcer” or “makes problems disappear” or “takes them for a little ride to the Pine Barrens”?)

Also, this is a thing that happened, and it was also beautiful:

spit-take1

spit-take2

spit-take3

AJ: You and I have definitely got to stop discussing our sex lives while drinking water.

Or, you know… you could just stop discussing your sex lives at all? Because it’s weird and inappropriate? (J/K DON’T EVER STOP, I LOVE YOUR WEIRD AND INAPPROPRIATE RELATIONSHIP.)

Case in point:

MICHAEL: [clearly trying to be mature about his parents hate-banging] So you guys can’t stand each other, yet you sleep with each other?
AJ: Uh, at least she’s not my first cousin. [to himself, as Michael walks away in disgust] Too soon?

BWAH!

Also, AJ basically said Michael was his only friend, which is both 1) accurate, and 2) sad, with a side of sweet yet pathetic. Basically I was having feels all over the place yesterday.

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15 thoughts on “The name’s Ms. Davis if you’re nasty.

  1. I loved the AJ and Michael scene — those actors are gold together, and who knew Chad Duell was good at comedy? I am so tired, however, of the jokes about AJ’s weight (AJ: We’ll see each other at the gym. M: You never go to the gym.). I think he looks fine, but even if the producers don’t think so, there is no need to continually insult the actor. Tyler Christopher has dropped a bit of weight (and muscle) since the previous time he was on GH, but when he looked bigger, no one commented on it.

    • Huh. It didn’t even occur to me that that line was a dig on SK’s weight. I just kind of took it as a reference to the fact that the last time we saw him at the gym, Sonny beat the crap out of him.

      • Yeah, I missed that too. I never think of SK as overweight, just thick like SB and as you pointed out, TC used to be. I was thinking today how much better TC looks with a regular sized neck.

  2. Thank you, Alexis! This is what Sam, Elizabeth, Carly, and every woman who has ever been involved with Sonny or Jason SHOULD have. This is what they should have said after Sonny shot Dante instead of having Olivia and Dante cover for Sonny.

  3. I can’t disagree with Alexis (elizabeth should be the one givingbthat speech to dead jason-lol) but isn’t it a little hypocritical of her to get on Shawn when she has killed 2 ppl and tried to kill others. Not really watching GH but about once a week and not at all the last 2-3 weeks. If Olivia had actually died then I’d probably care more but ppl like her, Connie or even Sonny who should croak are still around whining.
    I do like the AJ/Michael interaction but the AJ/Carly stuff ewwww, Sam with Michael and Kiki. ITA they made Morgan into an asshat but then he has parents who are the same.

    • Well, I mean… nobody’s hands are completely clean on a soap opera, but I think she made a pretty good distinction between killing someone in the heat of passion or self-defense or even out of personal vengeance, and doing it as a career choice. So no, Alexis’ hands aren’t completely clean, but she killed Alcazar in kind of a crazy fugue state after he left her and her baby to die, and she killed Kiefer by accident and chose to drive her daughter to the hospital rather than stop to check on the kid who put her there.

      The botched attempt on Helena’s life is the best correlation to Shawn’s situation, but again, I think there’s a point to be made about drawing a line in the sand between trying to kill the person who slit your mother’s throat and killing someone for money. One is personal vengeance and one is an on-going lifestyle choice.

  4. Although she didn’t mention her own attempted/actual killings, the dialogue implies that they fell under the realm of passion/fear for life/personal vendetta, whereas Sean’s murder-for-hire is completely cold-blooded. In RL this distinction might not mean much, but in the context of this soap she gets major points. There truly is a moral difference between Jason/Sonny (and now Sean) and other people in PC who have committed murder or attempted murder (including Alexis).

  5. Can we also mention that Alexis also defends these “murderers” and gets them off but that is ok??!! That high horse she is on must be making her dizzy!

    • Sure? But I still see a difference between doing your job as a lawyer and literally killing people for money.

    • My memory might be fuzzy, but I think she drew the line with murder. She was willing to defend Sonny and Jason against “small stuff” like trying to keep AJ’s parental rights away from him. But whenever it was something serious, she always refused. Also she stopped working for them in 2002 before the show became more explicit in what Sonny and Jason did. Before that it was always “the business” or “our organization”

      • Also, Alexis got back to defending Sonny because he was blackmailing her, right? I mean, the premise no longer applies, but she was supposedly doing it to get Kristina into Yale and it was a convenient reason to put her back in Sonny’s orbit. I think this is a perfect way to end that ridiculousness. But do we really think it will happen? I would LOVE to see a man actually leave the mob for love and family. It is the complete opposite of what we’ve seen in the decades of this show and it would make my heart happy. It would also make me happy to see Alexis stop working for Sonny. I think Shawn calling her on it makes sense and there are plenty of other lawyery things Alexis can do. She still has reason to interact with Sonny, even if their mutual kid is off being less annoying elsewhere. I see this all as a win-win if it actually happens.

  6. Alexis is a hypocrite pure and simple. I did not hear Alexis agree to quit her job working for Sonny. She willingly had a ONS with Sonny and would still be knocking boots with the mobster if he still wanted her butt. Sonny flashes those dimples and Alexis goes all weak in does whatever he wants.

  7. So love this blog. Makes the show itself better to get the color commentary. Alexis is a lawyer on a soap opera…of course the character has defended criminals and murderers. Like brain surgeons also work in the ER or a nurse whose job is always working on a floor magically becomes a scrub nurse bc the surgeon is her pal and requests her for his surgery. These things don’t happen irl but on a soap they don’t hire extras to accurately portray all the jobs in a hospital or to play all the different kinds of lawyers. Alexis’s character is a lawyer on a show that has been mobcentric for years. She’s had mob interaction but compared to the other women who have shared a script w Sonny/Jason, she’s so straight laced and ethical. So much so that she never gets a storyline.

  8. Alexis is and always has been a hypocrite. She has killed ,Bad Shawn defended Jason who also killed, Stole Michael while telling Zander to stay away from Sonny,He told her they had AJ tied up and she was filing coerced papers, while also being in his bed. She took Michael so the mobster could have him, then kept her kid from him. She was Jax’s lawyer until she had to say it was dangerous for Joss to be around the mob. When Alexis opens her mouth, I expect to see her tongue is black! GMAB

  9. Alexis…isn’t she one of daytime’s most prolific serial killers? Now Nancy Grahn’s probably the best actor in daytime but Alexis…she just gets on my nerves. When the show gets on my nerves I just update my ongoing FF story, “The Secret Life of an Accelerated Teenager”. It’s excellent therapy. ;)

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