Gimme Some VD: “Death and the Maiden”

Previously on Vampire Diaries: Katherine started falling apart — literally. Oh, and Amara’s alive. Whoops?

We open on Silas — making the most of his last (SPOILER) day on Earth by chattering away about his problems to some unfortunate fellow bus passengers. It seems getting stabbed in the neck by the love of his life has left him feeling a little philosophical about life, love, and the universe.

Silas bus stop

Which means he’s also changed him mind about helping Damon bring Bonnie back because that would thwart the universe’s desire to see Stefan and Elena together. Or something? (I’m sorry — are we really supposed to believe that Elena would blame Damon if Bonnie isn’t resurrected? Because that would seem awfully petty of her. And out of character.)

But the point is that Damon believes it, I guess. Of course, Silas also rather stupidly spills his change of heart to Damon ahead of time, which gives him time to come up with a counter plan. Silly Silas. Gloat AFTER your betrayal has succeeded. Not before! Villain 101!

Back at Chez Salvatore, Stefan wakes up with his memories mostly intact, but suffering some severe PTSD that he thinks he can magically cure by being the one to kill Silas. Um, I’m no therapist, but… pretty sure that’s not how that works, buddy.

Damon and Amara2

Meanwhile, Amara’s locked in the basement hearing voices and trying fruitlessly to kill herself. I dunno — does anyone else think they should have just put those two into a “I was trapped in a limbo between life and death for months/millennia and now I’m losing my mind” support group together?

Over at the Vampire University, Caroline still hasn’t twigged onto the fact that Jesse is in trouble, and Katherine is still apparently squatting while waiting for answers from Professor Jerkface. Unfortunately, the answers she gets aren’t good — seems she’s basically dying of accelerated old age, and there’s nothing he can do about it.

The good news (for me, at least) is that Nadia finally shows up. It looks like Katherine straight up ditched her following their little moment a few episodes ago. Nadia is eager to continue their reunion, but Katherine’s got her mask of indifference firmly back in place.

Bonnie and Jeremy plan

Jeremy and Bonnie have a visit with Amara that reveals she can see dead people. And touch them. (It’s an anchor thing.) This not only explains a lot of her particular brand of crazy, but also gives the gang an idea for a yet another plan that involves yet another lightning fast alliance switch: this time their goals are aligning with Tessa’s. She’ll perform a spell to make Bonnie the new anchor. That way, she’ll be able to interact with the living world and Amara and Silas will still be separated forever.

Side note: there’s a lot of Silas/Amara/Tessa in this episode, and I have to say, watching the magic that is Sleepy Hollow has only emphasized how bad Vampire Diaries is at even attempting to portray characters from another time.

Tessa

I mean, I supposed you could make the argument that Silas picked up all his modern slang and understanding of technology by mind reading visitors to his cave over the years. And maybe Tessa picked it up by watching from the Other Side. And I guess you could fanwank that Amara absorbed English by osmosis through being the anchor, or whatever.

But the truth is that whatever the reason, it’s just more fun when characters from another time period actually speak and act like characters from another time period, you know? I don’t need to hear Tessa making jokes about the Chez Salvatore sitcom. There are plenty of modern characters to do that. I’d rather all the 2,000 year old reanimated immortals and ghosts be allowed to seem a little different from the rest of the cast.

doppelgangers united

In any case, Katherine makes a deal with Tessa for aid with her little aging problem. And then, all the doppelgangers gather together so Tessa can harness their mystical energy to power the anchor transfer spell, or some other mumbo jumbo. (IDEK, you guys. Listening to this show try to explain its supernatural bullshit is like listening to Geordi and Data discuss dilithium crystals. I just smile and nod.)  

Nina Dobrev and some creative swirling camera work do some nice work playing all three of the Petrova girls in the same place. Blah blah, blood. Blah blah, chanting. And then… Silas interrupts the ceremony before it can be completed. Somewhere in the chaos, Stefan — still on his MUST KILL SILAS kick — nabs Amara and takes her out into the woods as bait.

Which works! So Silas and Amara have a another tender reunion. This time, she manages to dial back her crazy long enough to actually explain to him that she loves him, but also really, really has to die. Silas agrees to mercy kill her, and for all his earlier glibness, he’s actually quite affected. It’s the most genuine emotion we’ve ever seen out of him? I’d care, but he’s so tiresome.

Silas and Amara

Anyway! Stefan intervenes before he can slit her throat. And then, of course, he stands around freaking taunting Silas to death instead of just snapping his neck — like, seriously, Stefan? Don’t you know better by now? Silas gets the upper hand for a second and I worry that we will never, ever be rid of him. But then — then! — Stefan actually kills him! Like, for really real! (I hope.)

Damon comes running up to check on things just as Amara manages to get her hands on a knife and stab herself in the gut. Yeesh. Meanwhile, Tessa’s trying to complete the spell. There’s some tense editing, and we’re meant to think she’ll die before it can go through. But I think even the writers know that Bonnie only being able to talk to Jeremy is getting real old by now.

So at the last minute, Amara dies and Bonnie lives! Sort of! (Actually, she’s still dead, but corporeal now? But whatever.) The point is: everyone can see and touch her, so we get a nice Caroline/Bonnie/Elena reunion:

Bonnie Caroline Elena hug

After all the excitement dies down, Katherine goes to Tessa to collect on their deal. Only — whoops! Turns out she should have insisted on payment up front. Tessa not only has no intention of messing with life and death again, but she’s actually just stabbed herself so she can go back to the Other Side and gloat at Silas for the rest of time. Sounds… fun?

Before she can cross over, she leaves Bonnie with the final catch: as the new anchor, Bonnie will feel every supernatural death as they pass through her. And it will suck.

And finally: Nadia shows up again just as Katherine and Caroline are cementing their frenemy status. Katherine blows her off again — for her own good, it seems? Although Katherine may also just be emotionally constipated. In any case, Nadia’s abandonment issues live to fight another day.

Next time: Bonnie gets an adorable haircut! Also, Stefan could probably still benefit from some therapy.

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