Well, that was some bullshit.

So, last week! That was fun, huh?

I mean, sure, Felix referred to Robin as Patrick’s “babymama” and I might have almost reached through the television to strangle him. And yeah, maybe Sonny and Shawn spent just a little too much time casually discussing who to murder next.

Robin Patrick reunion2

But Jason Thompson’s never ending cry face! Sabrina fainting all over the place! Maxie getting slapped! It was pretty great.

Then there’s today. I just… what even was that episode?

PATRICK: If somebody would have told me I wouldn’t wrap my arms around Robin and take her home with me and never let her go if I ever saw her again, I would say that they’re absolutely crazy.
ME: YOU AND ME BOTH, BUDDY.

How hard do you think it was for Jason Thompson to get through that speech with a straight face? I mean, this is the man who has not only been playing Patrick as not over Robin in the slightest for the last two years, but who — just last week — literally paused for an ETERNITY with a pained look on his face when it came time to say “I do.”

And now, we’re supposed to believe he’s genuinely torn? Really?

Patrick douching it up

So many beats of this just aren’t working for me. Robin comes back from the dead, gives only the vaguest of explanations for where she’s been and why, refuses to go home with him — and Patrick… just goes to work the next day? Spends his morning playing jealous cave man with Carlos?

I’m sorry, but… WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK.

Where is his urgency? Why isn’t he beating down Anna’s door demanding explanations and face time with this miracle come to life? I buy Patrick hating the thought of hurting Sabrina. I do not buy for a second that he wouldn’t drop her in a heartbeat for the love of his life, though. Just… no. I kind of wanted to punch him every time he opens his mouth today. PATRICK. THIS IS NOT EVEN A CHOICE. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU, MAN? Ugh.

Meanwhile, something about Carlos is is suddenly starting to appeal to me.

Shirtless Carlos

I CAN’T QUITE PUT MY FINGER ON IT

Up until now, I’ve liked the actor more than the character. Jeffrey Vincent Parise is charismatic as hell, but Carlos’ whole cocky, stalky, “I know what you want better than you do” schtick kind pushes every one of my buttons.

But then he got all wounded and desperate at the thought of her being hurt. And he started wandering around shirtless and handing out awesome hugs. And — most importantly of all — he apologized for being a cocky, stalky asshole:

Carlos comforts Sabrina

SABRINA: I should have listened to you.
CARLOS: No, you shouldn’t have. I’m your ex. I came here trying to win you back. And you told me — you made it very clear — you weren’t interested, you met somebody else. And I kept right on going after you. I was being a jealous, possessive jerk.
SABRINA: You’re not a jealous, possessive jerk.
CARLOS: I can be. I have been.

That was pretty good for me. Team Carlos, y’all.

Naturally, our “heroes” are plotting his murder. How terrible are Sonny and Shawn? I know this isn’t exactly news to anyone, but still! Like, there’s the general terribleness of two dudes we’re supposed to like smugging it up over the thought of killing people. Which: gross. But typical.

Sonny and Shawn are the worst

But can we talk for a second about how utterly incompetent they are? First, they try to kill Franco in the freaking courthouse. And now they abduct a dude from his apartment and march him down to the public cemetery to have him dig his own grave in broad daylight? Say what you will about Jason, but he at least knew how to murder someone where no one might walk in on it.

It’s just embarrassing.

(And no, I’m not touching all the “Lily’s alive” speculation with a ten foot pole, because if I start to contemplate undoing Clink/Boom in the service of giving Sonny yet another freaking kid and Sabrina yet another totally unnecessary tie to the canvas, I will start rage puking and never stop. Refrain, RC. I know it’s hard for you, but please. Refrain.)

despair-divider

Oddly enough, the one story that didn’t piss me off today was the Franco/Heather stuff. Not because it was good. HAHAHAHA. Lord, no. That was completely terrible in every way.

But Franco murdering Heather is pretty much the last straw for me in terms of this gigantic turd of a character, and it’s actually kind of a relief. I’ve spent so much time being angry and baffled by everything to do with his resurrection, you know? And now: no more. I just don’t care.

Franco knifes Heather

If, after all the hoops they jumped through to “redeem” all his crimes with the most cavalier of story arcs, they now want to take him back to being a psychotic murderer? Fine. And if, after everything Franco did to everyone she loves, this effing murder cover up is supposed to be the big obstacle to his and Carly’s great “love”? WHATEVER.

I am done. Finished. Officially giving myself permission to fast forward this crap from now on.

p.s. If Heather freaking Webber is actually dead for good over this, I will straight up murder someone myself.

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25 thoughts on “Well, that was some bullshit.

  1. Well…you can’t make everyone happy now can you?… Anyway I hope Patrick chooses Sabrina over Robin and if he doesn’t, I hope him and Robin get back but he realizes shortly after that he made a terrible mistake and Robin makes a mistake by cheating on him with Carlos…(hilarious) she ends up pregnant by Carlos(Patrick’s enemy) Sabrina is pregnant by Patrick but leaves the country before he finds out. He looks for her but she is gone and the truth later comes out that she is carrying his child. Robin is out the Picture and he and Sabrina finally get married..lol…Far fetched but with GH; anything is possible.

    • Lolz…finally somebody who doesn’t wish Sabrina dead! I am disadvantaged with Robin bc being a 2006-ish on watcher, that character to ME seems one dimensional saintish and not interesting. I gather through flashbacks that she’s a legacy character and had some multidimensional story lines years ago but if you ONLY met Robin as an adult with Patrick, she’s not as interesting as she is to ppl who have known the character for years and years. But even I can see that Patrick’s love-of-life is Robin.

  2. Truths on the WTFery. Patrick has evolved enough that I wouldn’t expect him to just peace-out to Sabrina at the church at their wedding but the idea that he is REALLY conflicted in his heart is just nuts. Which he demonstrated when he asked Robin to come home with him. Carlos looks older than Patrick…is this story leading us to believe that he is Lily’s son? Bc I thought it was weird that Sonny had Lily’s pic in his desk. But Carlos is dying his beard black so is he supposed to be younger than Dante who does NOT need Just For Men beard dye? And FREAKIN FRANCO!!! I enjoy the actor and was willing to look the other way at the stupid brain-tumor-made-me-a-killer story but now he’s gone a-stabbin’ after the brain tumor came out. Whhhhhyyyyyyy?? But back to Sonny, his whole empire should be in ruins since Jason was his only henchman who could shoot the right person at the right time in the right place. He and Shawn seem to suck at murder.

    • Hah, no. That actor is 42. If they try to pretend he could be Maurice Bernard’s son, I will laugh even harder than I did when they tried to pretend he and Kelly Sullivan could have been in high school together. (And that was a LOT of laughter.)

      If anyone is Lily’s secret child, it’s Sabrina. Which would still be terrible on so many levels.

  3. Ugh. I had to FF many of the stupid Franco and mob scenes because the son was around and pointed guns and people held at knife point isn’t really good toddler viewing. What. The. Hell. Show. I’m so annoyed right now. You are right about Patrick on all counts. And would fighting for Patrick really mean that Robin would go beg to Sabrina to step down? I mean Robin did make a comment that Patrick was only having a hard time because he didn’t want to hurt Sabrina (true and hilarious) but still, just go talk to Patrick and shake the shit out of him. He must need it to be acting this way.

  4. WTF is correct on all counts. Seriously…he is just ok with the tiny bit of explanation she gave at the church. He watched the love of his life blow up in front of his eyes and he’s ok with “I was in danger, I’m not anymore. How have you been?” S E R I O U S L Y!!??!!?? And he goes to work the next day. SERIOUSLY?!?!? *BANGS HEAD AGAINST WALL * because that makes more sense than this Robin/Patrick/Sabrina storyline right now. I get that he’s going to be upset over hurting Sabrina (he’s human) but this cloud of confusion isn’t ringing true. Robin, I love you but really. Instead of going to talk to Patrick, like a normal person who has been “dead” for almost two years she goes to talk to Sabrina, I think I’ve said this before but SERIOUSLY?? Locked up for two years, holding on to nothing but the memory of my husband and my baby to stay sane and you think I’m going to waste my time trying to convince this woman to step down. Please…nothing and no one is keeping me from my man but the man in question. Until and unless Patrick says,” I don’t want you” I would be with him! All’s fair in love and war. This shouldn’t be a war because really we all know who Patrick truly loves but RC wants to make this a war so suit up Rob and go get your man!!

    Sonny and Shawn in broad daylight with a gun to someone’s head…who is writing this?? I just laughed because anything else was just way too much effort.
    Carlos…how old is he? He looks Sonny’s age.

    • Yes to all this. I was so excited when Maxie told Robin to go fight for Patrick. Yeah, I thought, the voice of the audience (and I knew it would be Maxie). But who fights for their man by going to the other woman? The only explanation I can buy is that Robin is traumatized and depressed from the whole ordea (and who wouldn’t be?) and seems to have lost a little of that Scorpio mojo. I hope there is some development in the storyline that lights a fire under her.

      And where is Robert? Would be kind of fun to see his reaction to Patrick’s ambivalence.

  5. Gotta agree with all of you. Its all a bit out of character for Robin and Patrick to be doing this.

    I get the reasons for it, Robin upset and maybe even scared of losing Patrick and he not wanting to hurt the Princess and being overwhelmed by the whole thing, Going to work was avoidance and a semblance of normalcy for him.

    Even with these reasons, Patrick needs to have ended it already. Dragging this out does not help this story and certainly from the looks of tomorrows preview help Sabrina or Felix characters.

    People like myself that liked Sabrina in the beginning, hate her now. Looks like they are doing the same thing with Felix. He is becoming more annoying each day….telling her there is still hope and telling her tomorrow that she can only go to Patrick ‘over his dead body’?? What is the point of this??

    Reunite Scrubs already!!

  6. I actually found the Patrick scenes with Sabrina and Carlos painful on Robin’s behalf,lol. And please no Lily. I know that RC has said something about being story driven and not character driven, but so many of the characters i love never seem to get the story. And to me certain characters could use a break. I woud love a few months of Liz, Alexis, Robin, Laura and Anna driven story lines.

  7. Sometimes I think I am the only Scrubs fan that didn’t hate Sabrina. She’s always been too one-dimensional and the story could have been so much better, but I didn’t hate her. But, come on, there is no way in hell that Patrick and Robin wouldn’t be spending every second together since her reappearance. And also rare for a Scrubs fan, but Robin’s actions piss me off more than Patrick’s. She said no. Why? Nothing about that moment felt authentic. Every moment of this story from Robin’s “no” has been even more poorly written than Patrick and Sabrina’s entire history. All of the characters involved are behaving completely out of character. I feel as though Guza has returned and I never, never, never want to feel that way!!

    And I’m sorry, but I still can’t stand Carlos. He’s awful and I personally don’t find the actor attractive or interesting and he’s just too damn old.

    • The only part that feels possibly genuine (and I wish they’d had robin SAY it) would be if she didn’t want to confuse Emma by coming home to her and Patrick’s house if Patrick wasn’t SURE that Robin was going to be in that house with him from now on. Bc in theory Emma actually knows Sabrina better than she knows Robin right now. So I can see Robin not wanting to confuse Emma with “mommy lives with us again! But maybe next week Sabrina will be my new mommy.” but they didn’t WRITE it that way.

      • This is a good point about not wanting to confuse Emma. I still feel like she should have gone home with him if only to talk about what happened and where she’s been all this time. Patrick and Robin’s reconciliation really was secondary to where she’s been and what she’s been through and they were solid enough in their relationship when she “died” for this to have been the conversation before the whole “are we getting back together” talk. The struggle of “who does Patrick want” at that point was unnecessary and didn’t ring true seeing as he’s been pining for Robin for so long. The fact of the matter is somebody is going to get hurt. Unfortunately for Sabrina and Patrick fans, I think it will be Sabrina.

    • I don’t actually hate Sabrina either, so you’re not alone. She’s not my favorite character, and she occasionally makes me roll my eyes a lot, but I don’t generally mind her existence.

      I do find it laughable that they’re suddenly trying to portray her relationship with Patrick as somehow equal to his relationship with Robin, though. If that’s what they were going for all this time, someone really should have told JT, because that is not what he’s been playing.

      Re: Carlos, that’s fine. More rugged silver fox for me. ;)

  8. After 6 months of blessedly tuning out, I just HAD to open the can of worms and watch Robin’s return to the screen. Ohhhh man, am I regretting that decision. Of course they were going to put Robin and Sabrina on equal ground with Patrick being torn between them. OF COURSE. I second everything in this post.

  9. I could see Patrick being torn if it was Liz, because the two were always friends and we have Cam, Aiden and Emma all bonding as a family. Sabrina brings nothing to the table just her tweenage self and Felix.

    • So you expected Patrick to drop his wife and be with Sabrina. The same wife we’ve seen him pine for all this time. The same wife who he went looking for on his wedding day. The love of his life, mother of his life, the woman for whom he left his player ways behind to be with. Not to forget that they were solid before she supposedly died. You dont want him to give his relationship at least a try. He should have just left her for the woman he’s been with for what, 8 months. I know we all have the couple we ship, but come on.

  10. Patrick will never leave Sabrina for robin not a million years because he loves her that much and he is building a future with her and emma as a family to make it official . Also , he is making new memories for himself and for emma and for Sabrina as well as a future family to be and replacing the old ones with robin in it with Sabrina

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