The bitch is back.

It’s hard to believe it’s been five years since we last saw Ric Lansing in Port Charles! (It’s also hard to believe he wouldn’t have come home to dance on Jason’s grave at least once before now, but whatever.)

Ric returns

YOU KNOW HE WANTED TO

When the news first broke that Rick Hearst was on his way back, I had three instant thoughts: 1) please do not let him be here for Elizabeth, 2) please do not let him be here for Alexis, and 3) please do not let him be here for Sonny. Because that is literally the least interesting thing I can  imagine.

So of course he’s working with Julian to destroy Sonny. OF COURSE HE IS. (I swear, the way my luck is going lately, he and Elizabeth will probably end up married again before the year is out. In which case the writers will deserve some special congratulations for resurrecting both of my most hated pairings for her in the space of one year.)

I admit, though: I could have forgiven a lot if Ric had just been the one to interrupt this scene the other day:

Julexis4

Julexis5

Seriously. My kingdom for Ric to see Alexis getting some on that living room floor! (And then for Julian to get all jealous/protective.) (I am nothing if not a woman for simple and predictable needs, people.)

But no. He and Julian will probably be crime besties. And meanwhile, I guess we’ll all just hold our breaths waiting for them to finally beat Sonn– haha, no. Sorry. I can’t even pretend there’s the slightest chance of that happening. RIC, LOOK AT YOUR LIFE. LOOK AT YOUR CHOICES.

despair-divider

In other news, my frustrations with Robin’s exit story remain, but I’m relieved that at least Patrick knows the truth. And that he’s getting to play the voice of the viewers in this whole mess.

You know, with his, “hey, call me crazy, but before you run off to thaw some super villains, maybe we should tell your mom, the super spy?” Or his “ROBIN, EVERY WORD OUT OF YOUR MOUTH RIGHT NOW IS DONKEY BANANAS.”

And most of all, with this most perfect reaction sequence ever:

Patrick's doubletake1

Patrick's doubletake3

Patrick's doubletake2

PATRICK: How do you know you can trust him? This could be an old picture. Jason could very well be dead.
ROBIN: Because he showed me evidence that Jason is still alive. But you’re right–you’re right, I don’t know if I can trust him. But what else–what other choice do I have?
PATRICK: [does visible double-take] WHAT?!

I may hate the way Robin is being written like an idiot, but I do love the way she and Patrick fight — like an actual married couple. Like two people who know each other inside and out, all their foibles and flaws and all the best places to hurt.

I can even imagine Patrick and Sabrina having a knock down, drag out like that, you know?

Robin's choice6

Plus, Jason’s Thompson’s beautiful teary face, as always, is the cherry on top of a gigantic ice cream sundae of feelings. And I loved that Robin got to throw in a dig at his wish-washiness in December:

ROBIN: He needs me right now.
PATRICK: Robin, we need you!
ROBIN: Patrick, he’s going to die if I don’t save him. And Sabrina needs you here–
PATRICK: Why would you even bring that up?
ROBIN: Why? Because I had to give you weeks — weeks! — to make your choice.

Patrick, you may be the sane one at the moment, but you totally deserved that.

I also appreciated her emphasis on how she suffered while she was captive and how she can’t stand the thought of knowingly allowing Jason to suffer the same:

PATRICK: The last time that you did this, you were gone for two years. So what is it this time — is it a week, is it a month, a year, 10 years?
ROBIN: All I know is that I spent two years as a prisoner, hoping and praying that someone would come to find me. Knowing… that nobody would.
PATRICK: We couldn’t come and search for you because we thought we were gone. We thought you were dead.
ROBIN: And so everyone thinks Jason is dead! He’s in the same place that I was. Except it’s worse!

The more Robin protests she doesn’t have any PTSD, the more my personal head canon cements that she’s acting out of deep trauma right now. It’s basically the only way I can accept any of this nonsense.

And hey, at least we got one love scene before she leaves, right?

Scrubs goodbye3

Scrubs goodbye1

In any case, Patrick’s magnificent double-take above would easily have taken the prize for Reaction of the Week… if not for this one of Silas, clearly capturing the moment of realization that his daughter is an inhuman monster :

Silas regrets everything

I’VE MADE A HUGE MISTAKE.

I realize I’m starting to repeat myself when it comes to Kiki, but she literally gets worse every single day. (Her smug-faced “I’m a VERY good judge of character” rant at Nate today? How did he keep from strangling her right there? HOW? The man has to be a marble-abed saint.)

Instead of going into all that again, though, I’ll just share the email my erstwhile co-blogger sent me, and I quote: “UGH, ALSO KIKI IS THE ABSOLUTE WORST. SHUT UP KIKI. YOU ARE A SMUG BASTARD AND COMPLETELY WRONG.”

Word.

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38 thoughts on “The bitch is back.

  1. agree with you on everything

    but sadly I can’t watch silas….because he’s with you know who…

    susan

    I did watch silas with his daughter though…..

    but yeah…we get ric back, and of course he has to be tied into the mob…

    Julian and alexis were great…..I hated that oh gee, rafe had to be a tattle tale..

    don’t get me wrong, guys, I’m not for molly and tj doing it…but, I’m against rafe being mister tattle tale…

    loved molly’s reaction to him…you’re a weasel….and he seriously thinks that she’s going to go and cry to him, about not being able to be with tj….

    he’s boring as all get out……

    so….

    susan

  2. Well Ric not being obsessed would leave him without a soul. It’s too integral to his character.

    Loved Julian and Alexis. Their scenes were both great to watch in terms of their discussion and how comfortable they’re becoming with each other and oh…when he turned around and went for broke (as the poor guy didn’t know if she might slap his face again) and dang Rafe for breaking up that hotness. But since the Lake House was Grand Central Station that night, it wasn’t going to go anywhere.

    I loved seeing Alexis embrace her Natasha side and though people have been slinging arrows at her on the internet for her reaction, I think she’s spot on. Molly gets knocked up, Alexis will likely be raising that child and footing the bill. Ric being Ric tried to cut her down for it for his own narcissistic reasons. I like how Julian even if he didn’t view teens and sex the same way Alexis did he was a supportive friend to him just as she’d been with him and Lucas. I love this pairing, best one on the show in my opinion and it’s awesome to see the show give them some time onscreen. It’s about time.

    Yeah Julian and Ric know each other. I don’t think one works for the other, I think they both work for someone else. Julian seemed perturbed at Ric suddenly showing up and definitely not happy that he strolled into Alexis’ house and made himself at home there. Saw a bit of territoriality there. The two becoming buddies? Somehow I don’t think so. What struck me was two little scenes where both men were in Alexis’ house and picking up photos of Alexis’ and family.

    Ric picks up a 2006 photo of Alexis and Sam and is all smug esp when he smirks at Rafe’s question about Sam and his seedy comment about being very close to his step daughter almost as if it’s a private joke. It’s clear he feels no remorse even now for what he did.

    Then you have Julian picking up the 2013 Nurse’s Ball photo of Alexis, Sam and Molly and the look on his face, very interesting contrast to Ric. Almost protective.

    So no, why I think Ric might be a source of conflict when Alexis finds out that he and Julian know/work together. I don’t think the two men are going to be friends.

    • You know, I also like the idea of them working together against Sonny while also having the strain because of Alexis. This COULD be delicious, even if Ric goes after Liz because.. whatever. Liz deserves Ric. (And I LOVE Ric but Ric is just the worst in some ways.)

      I was both grossed out and amused when Ric made that comment about Sam. I was like ‘dag yo!’

  3. I would have LOVED to have seen Ric’s reaction to the whole Dante reveal, learning Sonny SHOT HIS OWN SON!! Well, let’s hope these writers give him something good. Ric needs another story besides being the evil one who hates Sonny. He doesn’t even have to be nice or even a hero but i’d like to see some depth.
    So IS Jason alive? If he is, is he coming back (please no, he’s run his course)

  4. As much as I loved Ric and Alexis, and wanted it back, it’s clear that’s not going to happen. And as much as I didn’t want his return to be all about Sonny, the one thing that it has going for it is that he truly is a magnificent bastard. Go Ric go! One of these days you might win and the rapture will happen and we’ll both be left behind and so will Sonny and…things are never going to change, are they.

    I do agree about Michael Easton and his reactions. While I loath that he’s making it very hard for me to ff Kiki (shut up, Kiki!), he gives great background. In my head he got that from Robert Woods.

    To sum up, or digress, or both: “DONKEY BANANAS!”

  5. Yo, RIC IS BACK!!!! I thought his comment regarding Sam was hysterical. I’m surprised the writer’s even went there. You’d think by the way they’ve been writing her lately that she’s practically a vestal virgin, What can I say about Kiki that hasn’t already been said? Shes just. . .yuck. As for Alexis/Julian, am I the only that can’t stand them? Sorry, but Julian is way too hot and sexy for that controlling, anal-retentive, big-mouthed b**t**, (Sorry, guys, can’t stand Alexis.) Julian needs to dump that. . .I won’t actually type it. . .and get someone better. On to Silas, what’s his point on the show again? Um, don’t really know. Oh, and please keep Jason floating in the. . .well, wherever he was floating the last time we saw him. He needs to stay dead, dead, dead. And now Robin’s leaving and we have to deal with Purina Sabrina. That sound you hear is my head exploding. But hey. . .RIC IS BACK!!!!

      • Glad I could make you laugh. Seeing someone like Alexis with someone like Julian makes me laugh, too. Julian deserves someone who’s worthy of him, and she sure the heck ain’t it. She’s just. . .ugh. Alexis should have been written out of GH a long, long time ago. She outlived her usefulness and purpose years ago.

        Oh, and I won’t use the b-word as an insult, Or at all. No worries. But does that also include using the other b-word, like you did at the end of your blog to refer to Kiki (which was an insult to her)? Or is it just because I used it in reference to Alexis, who is obviously a favorite of yours? Just wonderin’.

        • “Bastard” does not carry with it the same cultural baggage as “bitch”, and does not bother me in the same way. Mileage varies, obviously.

          But, no, calling female characters that I dislike bitches, sluts, whores, etc, is not allowed on this blog any more than it is for my favorites.

  6. Poor Patrick. This is just nonsense. Carly…just nauseating w her Franco love-lift-us-up-where-we-belong and Robin judging. Robin may be acting bat poo crazy but Carly doesn’t get to judge. I usually pay little attention to teen it’s but I’m Team Molly on this one. Alexis misplayed that. A talk in the morning about lying about where you are? Yep. Grounded for lying? You bet. Totally wrecking the first healthy, responsible “first” a Davis girl has ever had? Nope. I liked that very subtle “you little **** block” look Julian gave Rafe though. Weasel!!!! May as well write young Rafe off the show bc no teenage girl would forgive that. Hell, I’m 20 years beyond teenage and I agree with the snake weasel comment.

  7. I need to do a catch-up, I see. I’ve been avoiding the show for the past few weeks because I just couldn’t stand what was going on with Robin, but finally watched all the Robin/Patrick scenes in a binge watch ( and I can see I’ll have to do a binge for Julian/Alexis/Ric also — so excited about that!), and I’m not sure if I’m glad or angry that they included that stupendous love scene. Absolutely loved it, such classic Scrubs, it so reminded me of their first time, that lovely combination of sweetness and passion. And yet I wanted to scream at them for wasting all that chemistry and passion for weeks and weeks while we watched Robin pace around a lab and Patrick take weeks to make a decision. Plus, I think they’ve really painted themselves into a corner, because no scene between Patrick and Sabrina could ever match what we just saw. I’d really rather see Sabrina/Carlos, who have the potential for serious chemistry, but I assume I’ll have to ff through Patrick/Sabrina instead.

    • I mean at this point to put Patrick back with Sabrina is downright stupid. He was willing to go to Africa, AFRICA and leave her behind and the baby. He even forgot about the appointment. I mean seriously Sabrina is clearly a distant second…and by distant I mean like around the world distant. Any Patrick and Sabrina scenes that follow will be just not compare. And well that love scene proved that Patrick is desperately in love with Robin and she him – and that will never change. Just find something else for Patrick to do in KMc’s absence. Just don’t put him back with Sabrina.

      They should make Carlos the baby daddy….and Robin comes back pregnant. Boom – fixed. Then they can ride off into the sunset (What a girl can dream, right?)

      • I totally agree with both of you. They wasted KMc time that they knew was limited. That scene finally got them back in the groove they had before she left. Even the whole fight scene was awesome and infuriating all at the same time!!

        They make magic out of everything, no matter how bad the material. I am going to miss them terribly and will go back to YT to get my Scrubs fix. Especially if they put Patrick back with Sabrina and not make this baby Carrrrlos’s. She is much more tolerable with him, there is more of a story there.

        I have to say I laughed every time someone mentioned Sabrina and the baby to Patrick and he was like, Sabrina and baby Who?? He clearly does not care enough for either of them.

  8. I don’t agree that Alexis overstepped. First, she had no guarantee that Molly and TJ were going to practice safe sex. Secondly, her daughter lied to her, and there’s really nothing in the way Molly relationship with Alexis has been written to indicate that Molly couldn’t have talked to her mother about feeling ready for sex. Thirdly, the age of consent for sexual activity in New York is 17; TJ’s too young to be charged with statutory rape (he’d have to be 21 for that), but still, Alexis is a lawyer as well as a mother. I don’t think Molly’s shown any indication of being mature enough for a sexual relationship, anyway; her ideas of love are straight out of fiction.

    As for Alexis not being sexy enough for Julian, well, I beg to differ. They’re the first pairing to hit this show in years that I’ve been genuinely invested in. They have chemistry, and meaningful obstacles. Great soap.

  9. I don’t think Alexis has behaved stupidly around Julian at all. In fact, it’s been a hugely refreshing change of pace. For that matter, I didn’t think she was stupid around Shawn; he was hot, they had an affair, she realized he was acting as Sonny’s enforcer, she broke it off.

    Granted, Alexis has terrible judgment, but she is a soap character. What I’ve liked about her scenes with Julian most (aside from the hotness) has been that she hasn’t been doing that trademark fluttery thing that started during the time that she began feeling attracted to Sonny and that the writers and NLG have been irritatingly consistent about ever since. Julian gets to her – but she doesn’t turn into a blithering idiot in his presence. I loved it when she told him to leave yesterday.

    • I did think it was a welcome change of pace from prior regimes when she pointed out that she thought he wasn’t telling the whole truth. As for her reaction to TJ and Molly? Legalities aside, I totally get mama bear. Your baby is your baby. Even when they’re 80 and you’re likely dead.

      • Yeah she had his number on that one and he knew it. Not much to say about it and when she wants him to back off, he always does. Much, much different than her other men.

  10. I beg to differ too on Alexis not being sexy enough for Julian.I think they’re a perfect match and they’re amazing to watch.play out their story. I’m happy that the show is finally investing in them by providing more air time. I think they’re the best couple the show’s had in a long time

  11. LiRic is my favorite GH couple ever, so I’m all for Ric going after Liz’s heart!

    Ric Lansing is wicked and sexy. Welcome home Ric!

    Robin’s exit story is pathetic. In fact, the 20 and 30 something women on GH are badly written.

  12. Yes, Alexis has acted goofy several times around Julian whenever the man is half dressed, because I saw posters at other sites mention how it’s become very annoying and sad at the same time. Alexis has had her fair share of relationships on this show and she acts silly when attracted to a new man (Sonny, Jerry, Shawn and now Julian).

  13. They did give Alexis the flustered treatment early on. However, that vanished almost completely once they kissed and has been less in evidence in all of her subsequent interactions with Julian than in any other pairing she’s had since Sonny. Which, as I said upthread, is one of the many reasons I’m enjoying their scenes together so much.

    • Yes, I noticed that too. I notice a bit more Cassadine in her too. As for flustered, that’s what happens when you well, get passionate and then someone knocks on the door. I loved how she was all worked up and then told Julian to “act natural”. They’re so entertaining to watch and yeah, the most natural pairing by far on the show.

  14. I think people need to stop with the Julian is way to sexy comment for Alexis, I think they are both HOT and SEXY and HOTTER and SEXIER together. I love there relationship together, better than any other relationship Alexis had. It seem to me very natural and hotter than most pairing on the show. Hope they keep it up.

  15. I don’t know why “how Alexis acts stupid every time she’s around some man. It’s beyond annoying,” is being brought up now after the past couple of weeks.

    Alexis hasn’t acted stupid around Julian in weeks. Their scenes have shown them as two adults who share a grown child and a grandson. They are attracted to each other, but they are at a point that they do not have that thick history because of the way things played out in how they met and how Sam was conceived. They are getting to know each other and they are developing real feelings for each other.

    If their past had been written as high school, young love separated by her family when her pregnancy was discovered, it would have given it different dramatic layers than the one Ron gave us when he decided to go the ONS route.

    Julian respects Alexis – all parts of her. He is going to have her back in a way no other man she has been involved with romantically has. Even Ned took Kristina away from her, which to me is unforgivable.

    They have had some deep conversations – even the dialog we do see between them indicates there have been conversations about things that have not been shown to us.

    Anybody who gets interrupted when they are about to have sex or while they are having sex is going to be flustered. They were going to have sex and Rafe interrupted. I loved that Julian teased her about it the next day, and she didn’t get flustered.

  16. shortblondeandsassy – I agree completely. For me, the change in Alexis’ responses from past pairings was most noticeable during the encounter that led to their second kiss, in Ava’s apartment, when he told her to look him in the eyes, she said, “I’m going to look over here,” looked away for a minute, and then, when she looked back, gave it to him right between the eyes that he’d deceived her for weeks. Ever since then, she’s been the Alexis I’ve always enjoyed so much. She’s been ill-served at different times by different writing regimes. RC has been giving Alexis more dignity than she’s had in years, and WdV is playing Julian as a man who is falling for her for all the right reasons. NLG has not had this kind of satisfying material in years. I think the last time I enjoyed her storyline this much was during the Mixed Marrieds story, when they completely failed to give Jax and Alexis the love story the material and chemistry demanded. (And I’m not saying I want that now – that ship sailed, and their friendship is lovely.)

  17. I love that we are seeing Alexis and Julian falling for each other but also developing a friendship. I loved that he went to the Metro Court with her.

    I loved the scene at the house when they were saying good-bye, he puts on his coat, starts to leave, then turns around because he just cannot not kiss her.

    If I had ever spoken to my mother the way that Molly spoke to Alexis in the hotel room, she would have drug me out and through the lobby in that cheap little red floozy nightgown by the hair. And she would have smacked me with her purse while doing so.

    I have a feeling we are going to see Molly go even brattier and want to live with Ric. It will break Alexis’s heart, but if Molly moves out Alexis and Julian can have to whole house to themselves. :)

    • Scene of the day! Of the week!
      “You snatched the murder weapon, and then, this is my favorite part, you took it back to my house and you tried to throw it in a lake but you missed. You missed the lake!

      – Do I look like a woman who regularly throws things?

      – It’s a lake!”

      • “it’s a LAKE!” made me laugh too. Still face palming over this insane exit story they’ve written for Robin so AJ’s line was extra great for me. He better not get killed bc I’m losing my patience w soap characters who go to confront/mock/antagonize somebody tried to kill them without telling ANYONE they know where they’re going or to call the police you don’t hear from me in an hour. I took that much precaution for a blind date.

  18. Am I the only person who clapped like a seal when Sonny shot A.J.? Take THAT Mr. I-am-a-thief-but-I-totally-have-honor-and-would-NEVER-lie-to-my-children-My-Word-is-my-bond-cuz-I-have-um-honor-*mumble*-and-stuff!

    • I couldn’t clap. I was too busy raging and screaming at Sonny! I’m livid! Not only he broke his promise to Michael but he shot an unarmed innocent man. Hate Sonny.

      • I don’t like Sonny either. But for once they showed Sonny’s hypocrisy in clear ways without wiggle room. Not only did he shoot AJ, he liked it! If Sonny would just own his villainy, I’d like him more.

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