So, Crichton-Clark is no more and the final score is: two Cassadines down, one not actually a Cassadine after all, and the most fabulous Cassadine — along with her fabulous gams — back among the living.
VICTOR’S AMAZING STYLIST STRIKES AGAIN
Although considering Stavros has now “died” a BAZILLION times, if I were Dante, I would have spent a little less time hugging my wife and a little more time giving him a triple tap to the head followed by a bullet in every major organ, burning the body, and scattering the ashes to the four corners. But if soap characters ever stopped to really make sure the bodies of super-villains were dead dead, 99.9% of the plot would never happen.
Anyway, things that were super good for me in the last few days, in no particular order:
1) AVENGE ME! Kudos, Peter Harrell, Sr. That was an amazing exit for a character no one remembers or cares about. (And kudos to the casting director for finding an actor who looks so much like an older version of the OG Peter Harrell that I literally didn’t realize they weren’t the same person until IMDBing them just now.)
2) Maxie and Nathan kissing and having a sexy firearm lesson on top of a pile of corpses. Will. Never. Stop. Cracking. Me up. But at least one of those corpses was Levi, and she got to stab him for herself. I might have stood up and clapped.
3) The longest self-destruct sequence in the world! Hope there weren’t any any legitimate patients languishing in comas at Crichton-Clark, because now they’re toast. (Do all Cassadine lairs come standard with a self-destruct mechanism? What am I saying, of course they do. Spoon Island is probably actually a volcano in disguise.)
4) Kathleen Gati’s luminous hair, because Mutti Dearest has really been working it the past few days. I guess you sort of have to look amazing while murdering old lovers and dropping vague paternity hints? (DAMN IT, I WANTED NATHAN TO BE A CASSADINE.)
5) Patrick and Sam’s super hot make out. I’m glad we got in at least one good grope before you-know-who shows up to probably wreck everything. And I love Patrick running home to gossip about it with his BFF, Liz.
6) Helena’s sigh of put upon annoyance after Jason killed her minions. I know, Hels. It is so hard to get decent henchmen these days.
On a related note, things that are puzzling me: the bizarre decision to reunite Jason and Robin — both awake and alive for the first time in two years — while he’s a mute and headless body double.
THE MOST ELOQUENT JASON’S EVER BEEN
I realize it’s tricky because they don’t actually have Burton and they’re clearly going to somehow acknowledge the face change when Miller comes on. But I mean… seriously? Both of them thought the other one was dead, and for the reveal we’re only playing half the scene? Lame.