Exercises in frustration.

It’s been a rough couple of days in Port Charles. Franco was on screen for large portions of time, not telling Michael that Sonny murdered AJ, i.e. the one and only thing that could possible make him relevant.

Jordan was on screen, waving a gun around and not using it to shoot Shawn, even though she practically had an engraved invitation to do so.

Jordan to the rescue1

GIRL, WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR???

Shawn — whose job description is literally MAFIA HITMAN — was on screen, not getting hit with lightning while complaining that Ava is a “cold-blooded killer” and “a piece of work” because she didn’t agree to be kidnapped like a nice girl. I’m actually not sure which was more funny/enraging — the above dialog, or Sonny berating him afterward for failing to shoot the woman he’s sleeping with so he could deliver the woman carrying Sonny’s child/grandchild for execution.

(Trick question: both things made me want to rage cry until I blacked out from how much I hate both these characters.)

Ava and Morgan

Honestly, if the goal of all this was to make me root for Ava, then mission accomplished? I guess? Even though she is also terrible, it’s hard not to sympathize when every scene with her resembles an animal trying to gnaw it’s own leg off to escape a trap. It’s even making Morgan — Morgan! Of all people! — come off as slightly dreamy while taking her side and promising to protect her.

(Not by doing the super obvious thing, of course, which would be simply telling Sonny that he knows about his plans and will disown him forever if anything happens to Ava. I said he was dreamy, not bright, okay?)

Speaking of animals in traps, everything to do with Robin has basically become excruciating. I just can’t with this constant kidnapping or the fact that the writing forces her to be complicit in her own victimization. It’s weak and contrived, and you cannot convince me in a million years that Anna and Patrick would swallow that incredibly unbelievable story.

Robin makes terrible choices

JUST HANGING OUT IN MY SCRUBS IN PARIS,
TAKING SKYPE CALLS FROM A CAR. THAT’S NOT WEIRD.

I realize everyone’s in a bind so long as Kimberly McCullough isn’t sticking around long term, but can we just have Robin leave town for some intensive therapy to deal with what must be a massive case of PTSD at this point? Let Emma visit with her off screen? Let her not be a captive anymore? Please?

Or maybe St. Jason will save her. Because I don’t know if you’ve heard, but he is a paragon among men, a hero among heroes, and mere mortals cannot possibly hope to understand his greatness. At least, according to Helena, Robin, Carly, and basically everyone who’s suddenly remembered he exists.

(Which isn’t to say that the scenes where Elizabeth saved his life and held his hand and proved that Rebecca Herbst could literally have chemistry with a stone were not super good for me. BECAUSE THEY WERE.)

Liz saves Jason

Liz saves Jason2

LOOK, I’M EASY, OKAY?

Also good for me: everything about Julian and Ned’s teenage testosterone throwdown over Alexis. (Will “Stay out of this, TED!” ever stop being funny? No.)

Plus casual references to Ned’s history with bigamy and this little gem:

Julian and Alexis

ALEXIS: You don’t know anything about Ned.
JULIAN: Well, I know he doesn’t make you quiver. I know he doesn’t break your back the way you like it. And I know he doesn’t love you the way I do. You know what, go ahead, take him for a spin. It’s not gonna work. Eventually you’ll realize nothing compares to me. And you’ll be back. I just hope for your sake that I’m still waiting around.

Daaaaaamn, these two. First of all, A+ use of the word quiver, Julian. And extra points for smoldering.

Points deducted for the bullshit at the end, though. Shouldn’t he still be in the groveling phase? Call me crazy, but if a lady dumps you because you lied to her about being in the mob and got her house burned down, then you really don’t get to pull the smug romance novel douche hero routine for at least 6 months.

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19 thoughts on “Exercises in frustration.

  1. I was hoping Jordan would shoot Dudley Do-Wrong. We know she would a) at least hit her intended target!, and b) be given the opportunity to pour forth her hotness into someone more stimulating, because Shawn, no matter how hard he tries, just doesn’t do the trick.

    As much as I may not care for Ava, I was appalled by all the hit men shooting like crazy with no care to the fact that a pregnant woman was in the line of fire…and as if she didn’t have that, she also has to deal with Sabrina, which is torturous in more ways than one. I’m actually starting to root for Ava in all this mess.

    I truly don’t get why the writers feel the only way to write Robin off when KMc’s stint is over is to have her taken from her family against her will. It may bring back former beloved villains like Helena and Jerry Jax, but it sure as hell isn’t entertaining when her loved ones don’t even realize something is seriously wrong, and they just drop her like a hot rock, and don’t listen to the one person who knows something is wrong, her daughter. It makes me want to shake Patrick till his dimples fall out! I hope Robin comes home to her family and is vindicated, because this is such a slap in the face to her fans.

    Okay, rant over! Sorry for the rambling on!

  2. her like a hot rock, and don’t listen to the one person who knows something is wrong, her daughter. It makes me want to shake Patrick till his dimples fall out! I hope Robin comes home to her family and is vindicated, because this is such a slap in the face to her fans.

    I agree…I didn’t watch that eppy and I’m so glad…that I didnt’……

    and sorry to say…..but I cant’ stand him and that other woman……..people think they’re hot…..all I think is that they’re forced, forced…and more forced……

    susan

  3. we need so much more of Julian, alexis, ned and Olivia…those are my must see days now…

    I so couldn’t care less about the vilians, never have, never will…and them to keep on bringing them back from the dead, bores me to tears……..

    susan

    • I love what NLG and WDV are bringing to Julian and Alexis. I LOVED those scenes, loved the mad chem but also the emotional underpinnings. Finally a couple I totally “get”. The push and pull between the two…yeah Julian can be an ass but he’s caught between wanting his family including Alexis to live versus his passion and love for Alexis. I can’t get enough of that! Ned’s just “angst” but he’s not really necessary. Julian and Alexis bring enough on their own and thanks to two talented actors they bring it. Yeah Julian was a Harlequin douche but today’s scenes with Alexis, Sam and Patrick revealed that Alexis had his number. She understands him as well as he does her but she doesn’t broadcast it. Today at the PH when she went Natasha on him at the very end…well it made me look very much forward to see what happens next!

      The show might be a hot mess but I’d watch Julexis recite canned good ingredients over much of what passes for plot. The actors are THAT good. Instead I like where their plot is going. I can’t wait to see it continue.

  4. (Not by doing the super obvious thing, of course, which would be simply telling Sonny that he knows about his plans and will disown him forever if anything happens to Ava. But I said he was dreamy, not bright, okay?)

    I don’t know if that would stop Sonny/work. Sonny has a son who he’s shot in the chest, and yet that son forgave him and chats him up on the regular. So if Morgan said “I’m gonna disown you forever”, Sonny would probably just say “yeah yeah”, shoot Ava, and expect to be forgiven anyway. And if Morgan took too long coming around, Sonny would just sigh and say, “are we still going on about the time I shot what’s her name??”

    • That may be true; but I still think it’s passing strange that Morgan – who knows Sonny is trying to mend fences with him – doesn’t even think to try to intervene on Ava’s behalf. “Dad. You screwed my girlfriend and we still don’t know if her baby’s yours or mine. I’m telling you now – if you want to make this up to me – guarantee her safety. Full stop.”

  5. also, some people are not as understanding as you are about Shawn not shooting Ava lol. A youtube comment I saw:

    Man the fuck up shown!!! really jason never put a woman or some pussy before his dam job!!! Hurry back jason sonny! Needs u since his new hit man is thanking with his dam dick !

    ah, youtube.

    • ITA with all that was said above especially Elizabeth and her chemistry with everyone. As a response to this youtube comment someone should have said –yes Saint Jason did think with his dick because he took Sam back after she tried to have his son disappear–twice. Though I agree shawn sucks and Jordon should have shot him in his crotch.

    • Sometimes I imagine aliens coming to Earth and trying to learn about us through YouTube comments. And then immediately nuking the entire planet from orbit because it’s the only way to be sure.

  6. Ok, May need to YouTube this one. Gone all week and so have not watched any. But Helena? Absolutely agree about Robin. It really wouldn’t seem odd that she and Patrick would be apart right now and have Emma visit. Couldn’t she go hang with Robert?

    • You know, I have a theory: Robin is a professionally kidnapped person. Since she was a child, like clockwork, she’s been held against her will. From people and from her own body. She has barely lived an actual life. I have come not to expect much from her because I honestly don’t think she knows how to get away anymore.

  7. Yeah yeah yeah he caused her house to get burned down..I understand all that..but DAYUM..that joker came strong with his…He said “I bet he doesn’t break your BACK like I do!”…*amn Julian…That made me a little moist on my darling `Lexie’s behalf! I love how she squirmed too..Like. “can’t deny it! tru dat!” Mental high five. LOL

    I have abandoned GH,sort of, I still read blogs, but I quit watching. ANDDD I have missed all this AWESOME freaking loving that my darling ALEXIS (Natasha!) has been getting. Thank the YOUTUBE GODS and their loyal subjects!..I.e.all these wonderful folks who clip and paste it all together for me because I have literally just binged on a years worth of Lexis loving and it is (HOLY CRAP) HAWTTT FANTASTIC!

    Yeah Julien is a mobster, yeah yeah yeah..So what I don’t care. ALEXIS IS HOT AND SEXY and wanted and getting it good and hot on a regular!! WHOOO HOOOOOO… I mean he gives her the ‘I wanna screw you NOW’ eyes on a regular. I mean he seriously adores him some ALEXIS! Again, I am strictly going from Julexis fan pages and clips but what I’ve seen has been smokin’! I may even start watchin again…okayy thats a lie..No I wont..BUT STILL WHOO HOOO for ALEXIS getting some, and FINALLY being acknowledged as the hot sexy GODDESSS that she is!

  8. Loving the Jason/Elizabeth scenes and also sam and Patrick have really good chemistry— that scene with them sleeping in the same bed, super cute. Finally GH has couples I might like. Hope they follow through with jason and Elizabeth this time…

    • sorry but sam and Patrick make me want to puke..

      Jason and liz…well I figured that she and billy would have good chemistry and so far so good….they’re doing all right…

      but sorry folks…never, but never will I like sam with anyone……

      susan

  9. Personally, I like Sam and Patrick better than I ever liked any other pairing for either character. I’m going to risk the rotten tomatoes. I like them better than Patrick/Robin or Sam/Jason. They’re genuinely charming together.

  10. My problem is that I like Sam with everyone. I think she and Patrick are a great pairing, but I even liked Sam with GV’s Lucky and all credit for that goes to KeMo. I hope they do not dismantle the potential perfection of Patrick and Sam for a redo of either Robin and Patrick or Sam and Jason, unless and until Robin is back permanently.

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