Bill and Luke’s excellent history lesson.

Happy New Year, everyone! This is not the year in review post, because it’s not done yet. I’m the worst. Sorry. But hey, at least we know who FauxLuke is! (Probably? Unless the last two days have been another elaborate red herring?)

Bill Eckert

But no, for real: it’s totally Bill Eckert. And I’m not fully on board, because despite Bobbie’s big smear campaign yesterday, I don’t remember him being a murderous, child-abusing womanizer? But I’m also not opposed, because this is looking like it’s going to be a completely bonkers history lesson with rogue Spencers popping up out of the woodwork, and you all know I love that crap. 

Also, let’s be real. I would accept just about anything to get some movement on this story at this point.

(Also, also: it’s worth it for the look of comical shock on Luke’s face as he — after spending literally months locked up with nothing else to think about — considered for apparently the first time the possibility that a man who looks just like him might be the one guy he knows who… looks exactly like him.)

Luke figures it out

MUST BE GOOD DRUGS IN MISCAVIGE

I mean, I know Bill’s been “dead” and all, but come on, Luke. You’ve killed Stavros Cassadine how many times now? Someone being “dead” should never rule them out as a suspect in this town.

In other news, Johnny’s out of prison, and he promptly ran into every woman he’s ever dated. As you do.

JOHNNY: Connie and I, we had a complex relationship. And I admit I was not always a gentleman to her. But quite frankly, when she wasn’t herself, she wasn’t always a lady.
OLIVIA: [slowly, as if speaking to a toddler] Well, she was mentally ill. And I know that she put you through the ringer, but you could have stepped up and gotten her help at any time. And if you had, things might have turned out much differently.
JOHNNY: You’re right.

“Not always a gentleman to her” is such an interesting euphemism for repeatedly having sex with her while she was unable to give consent, preventing her loved ones from getting treatment for her mental illness, and gas-lighting her into thinking she was responsible for the deaths of a small child! And by “interesting” I mean WOW, I’M STILL REALLY MAD AT JOHNNY.

Jolivia reunion

AND YET I STILL HAVE JOLIVIA FEELS.
IT’S ANNOYING.

Speaking of handsome mobsters I once loved and now want to hit with a brick: oh, Julian. For a brief moment when he walked into Anna’s office, I stupidly assumed he was finally, finally, FINALLY going to make a deal with the cops, turn on the boss who is trying to kill him for the umpteenth time this year, and go into witness protection to save himself and win back Alexis.

But no. Of course not. Why do that when you send yourself to prison for a murder you didn’t commit? No one ever gets killed in prison!

Sometimes I think this show doesn’t give me the things I want just to torment me.

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12 thoughts on “Bill and Luke’s excellent history lesson.

  1. I missed the last 10 minutes of yesterday’s show…yeah, gee, maybe that would have been a great send off, Julian…to say what’s really going on…and finally get the mob stuff, away from us for awhile….

    I so dont’ care anything anymore about these mobsters..and it’s can’t believe been nearly 25 years…that I haven’t cared…

    when they had mobsters, they’d go away, like the jeromes the first time, they had the smiths, the z’d…all kinds…but noooooooooo all we do is get more and more, and more….it’s sick now..

    I wish that mb didn’t resign the contract……..and who knows, maybe johnny heading up the mob, would have been more interesting…but nope……

    not a chance…

    I still say that if they’re so in love with the mob, go and do their own show, and give us back the real GH…

    susan

  2. I just kept thinking “the mob has eaten GH again.” Ick. The Julian plot is entirely to give Sonny something to do in jail. Uh, you could actually create a story there that just isn’t characters sniping at each other. Whatever. I’m so not enjoying anything right now.
    I felt like they were backing away from the Bill reveal a bit and wondered if they were going to say that Bill had a long lost twin who blames Luke for Bill’s death. Whatever the reason I’m sure it will be convoluted as fuck so I just wish they would be out with it and move on.

  3. I too almost spit out my water when I heard Bobbie and Luke talking about Bill Eckert. I totally didn’t recognize their description of him as an abusive womanizer. If I remember correctly he tried to protect his son Sly from his mother Nancy who was trying to take him away. I looked up his story line on Wikipedia, all about Harlan Barrett and some sort of cartel that Faison was involved with. “Harlan Barrett, Leopold Taub, Cesar Faison, and Larry Ashton formed a cartel to control global business via the use of a toxic substance, carbon disulfide, manufactured at a cannery they purchased as a clever ruse for their operations and a place to brew the drug with which they intended to rule the world.”

    I certainly don’t remember that Luke and Bobbie having another sister named Patricia (why hasn’t she ever shown up lo these many years?), although someone on Twitter yesterday said that they mentioned her once when Luke and Bobbie first joined the show. I certainly didn’t remember them having grown up in PC before they moved to Florida to live with Aunt Ruby.

    Hey, I’m all for Sly Eckert coming back into town to look up his cousins. I would rather have more Spencers than relatives of Obrecht.

    • I never knew about the second Spencer sister either, but yeah, apparently she’s not actually a new invention. Which is interesting. Also interesting that Larry Ashton has a history of shady dealings with Faison. All that was before my time…

  4. I was quite surprised about another Spencer sister too. When Bobbi mentioned that I was shocked. I wasn’t watching when they first showed up in Port Charles though. Luke and Laura were on the run from Frank Smith, when I first started watching. I didn’t know if this was new or not until you just said Patricia. I never even heard of Patricia before. I didn’t hear Bobbi say the name. Of course I am a few days behind, catching up. I was watching the episode from the 5th.

  5. Sorry I had Julexis feels. That fantasy sequence was hotter than anything that was going on in reality. It’d be nice for once not to see Bob Guza’s favorite trope of Alexis losing a man to a younger woman not win out once again. I have hopes.

    I just am not sure how Julian and Alexis will reunite. But on the day their fantasy scene aired, “JulexisGH” trended a long on Twitter.

  6. Bobbie and Luke have mentioned being children on Elm Street before they moved to Florida. Bobbie worked for Ruby there in her brothel, then moved back to PC to be a nursing student .

    Mentions of Patricia, the older sister, go back to 1978. She’s not a Carlivati invention. She’s just getting more history.

    Since Alexis and Olivia both have children around the same age and Olivia was with Sonny who is only a few years older than her, I don’t think Olivia really translates into “younger woman.” Just my opinion.

    • I did, and if you heard a scream of joy yesterday, that was me. I also heard they might recast, so that scream of agony? Also me.

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